Pre-Op Trauma - Social Media

It's great to have a support group, right'? But what about when the support group is filled with posts, questions, and messages that send you spiraling into self-doubt and having you flip-flopping on the decision to have bariatric surgery?

My best advice to anyone who is the in pre-op stage: remove yourself or unfollow bariatric surgery groups on Facebook or elsewhere as soon as you can, and don't look back until after your procedure is done.

I had to do this as well! Of course I had the best of intentions joining these groups, looking for information about the surgery and trying to soak up as much knowledge as I could so that going into it, I was prepared and ready and able to face it with confidence. Then in the weeks leading up to surgery, I started paying more attention to the posts where something went wrong. This person had a leak in their sleeve. This person couldn't stop vomiting and couldn't eat or drink. That person became incredibly ill with no rhyme or reason after surgery, and almost died.

I know I drove my husband crazy. "Maybe I shouldn't do this. Now I just read where someone posted that they weren't able to pee without a catheter after surgery!" He always reassured me that complications are rare and that I need to remember, people like to post about the negative and not the positive. And it's true! I was so filled with anxiety after reading all of these posts that I nearly cancelled my procedure the week before because I was sure that it was the wrong decision.

I decided I need to leave the groups. I wasn't getting anything out of them anyway, definitely not "support" at that point. I was able to just unfollow on Facebook, then after I had my surgery I started following those groups again and honestly, it was the best thing I could have done for my mental health at that time in the process. All of the information I needed was in the packet that my surgeon's office sent home with me on day one.

My point is, don't let anyone else determine how you decide to proceed. Please, please, please remember that there are always Debbie Downers when you're in a group with a large amount of people. Just last night I was able to give this same advice to someone who was struggling with the decision to proceed. She made a post asking about complications, and you know what? She had over 200 comments, most telling her that they were fine with no complications, but there were 5 or 6 where people went into great detail about all of their aches, pains, problems, and complications. In my opinion, much of what people were telling her was the person's own fault. They didn't take their vitamins, didn't like protein shakes so they just didn't drink them. Tried to eat regular food three days after surgery (!!!), didn't follow the diet properly. I shared with her everything that I am writing here, and she responded to me (out of over 200 comments!) to tell me that I had no idea how much I just helped her by letting her know that the Facebook groups also stressed me out and that she would be fine.

Just like any surgery, there are risks involved. If you do as your doctor says, follow your plan and instructions, you have an amazing chance of coming through perfectly!

**I am not a doctor and this blog post is not a substitute for medical advice from a qualified physician. Medical concerns and questions should be directed to your surgeon.**